just what we need

Today, in my work junk email:

Horny pills - $2.99/dose

Love pills - 75% OFF

notes to self

1. Buy a fairly new car, that will not need extra work done on it, only the simple, regular things like oil change, which you can do yourself.

2. Work harder, make more money, in the event that the newer car you bought does need work. Then you will be able to afford to take it to a mechanic who can fix it much faster than you can yourself. But find a good mechanic who knows what he's doing, and doesn't charge you three months of rent, like the crazy dealer does.

3. If you have to work on your own car, do not laugh at the head mechanic when he swings the hammer and totally misses his target, even though it's freakin hilarious and working on the car is too serious. Laughing causes you to get yelled at. No fun for anyone.

4. Tortillas warmed in the microwave will never taste good and soft like you want.